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~ Monday, May 16, 2005 ~

perhaps you will never ever know how much i love you
i often deny myself,
saying that you are just but just another guy.
only to come to this conclusion:
although i know that you will only love her,
i can never completely get you out of my mind.
i tried my best to treat you as an ordinary friend.
but it just breaks my heart,
just knowing how much you love her.
i would very much want to accept it but i guess i cant.

ahhh! rachel. how stupid can you get? he has already got someone. you should just back off and stop thinking about him. and just another reminder, you are only 15, not 50 my dear. and there is still alot in life that you have yet to see. love consultant! do what you so often preach! lol.

hahah. yar lah. i guess there is more to life than just love. i am convinced after seeing so many cases of people getting so frustrated, confused and upset over it. how contradicting can this world get? is love as pure and true as it is made out to be? i doubt. perhaps it's just me and all the television programmes i have been watching. well, maybe not lah. after being a love consultant for like almost three years of my life, i do agree with their view to a certain extend. hahaha. why cant the people of this world be born simple and innocent? just love this one person, get married and settle down. lol. anyway i guess there are some things that are just simply beyond our control. and i agree with pris and qiang. "God is faithful. He has a good plan for us. and He is the only one who knows who is the best for us. so leave it to Him."

in conclusion, human love is crap! there's only one love that will last forever, one love that would give unconditionally and one love that would give up so much for anyone. that love is the love of God! He loves you! He loves you so much that he was even willingly to lay down His life for you, so much that He stands waiting at your door everyday knocking and waiting for you to open the door. God loves you more than anyone else in the world. He is crazy about you, so much so that He even knows the number of hair on your head which you yourself do not even know. He is the creater and the almighty, yet He chose you. would you not just give Him that chance to be your freind? I chose Him and i hope that my dear friends, one day you would too.